So then.. I thought if I'm no fun to the kiddies.. then I'm no fun to my friends..hubby..colleagues etc? What have I become? Madam Cenc in the making? Madam Cenc pun buat Qi Gong pagi2 pukul 5 and go to theatres or movies..
Truth be told.. the last time I probably did anything remotely interesting for myself would be the teambuilding program.. sad aint it?
Hobbies..interests.. of course I have! I love watching movies..TV..used to read a lot..enjoy hanging out with friends on Friday after work..do lunch with ex-collegues..go to facial or spa treatments at least once a month.. go swimming.. But now do I have the time, partner, friends to share hobbies and interests= 0..zilch..nadda.. I bought Dina Zaman's book like 3 months back but I'm still at pg 30! The last movie I watched was Transformers?
I guess this is why I've become someone sceptical..moody..jealous..easily irritated..insecure.. whatever else lah.. and seriously I don't like it at all! If this goes on I can't imagine what I'll turn out to be in the next 5..10..20 years.
Who should I blame for being this way but myself.. yeah...with family, kids, work I can always complaint that I don't have the time.. but if I really want to surely something can be done...compromises must be made..so from today onwards I will start making some changes to myself.. my routine..my life.. I refuse to be uninteresting.. I detest being lame and boring..
I'll start small.. like today.. I kemas my car before going to work.. decided to dress up extra..not the usual B*SN's standard of makcik2 dressing.. pakai bedak and sikat rambut betul in front of the mirror instead of just kelam kabut kat dalam kereta.. :) and it made me feel good..lunch will be with an old friend later.. I thought I'll try something new with hubby and kids as well.. even if it looks as if I dah buang tebiat.. :p
Not sure until when I can keep this up.. kadang2 I'm also prone to be "hot hot chicken shit"... but something good is always worth trying right..especially if it's for the better!
narrow minded thinking...u choose to be negative and for sure negative thing u'll see. next time u've to think more before u write anything.i remembered the family trip last august but none of the story being written in this blog.why? good moments irritate u? all this while u keep on potraying unfortunate moments in the blog. should change a bit. be more positive n fair to ur family and yourself.if all the negatives thing really happen to u then there is no wrong to share it but do spare some space to share the good moments too....
ReplyDeletejijie,
ReplyDeletecuma nak share pengalaman sendiri. dulu saya pun selalu rasa camtu. selalu rasa diri ni teramat boring & selalu memboringkan org lain. lama2 saya buang perasaan tu sbb makin lama duk layan, makin rasa diri ni tak guna.
penah jugak rasa nak buat itu ini, pegi sana sini tapi takde peluang. sebenarnya kita silap. peluang tu sentiasa ada. yg penting kita kena pandai curi masa (maklum la, kita ada suami & anak).
kalau tak sempat melalui masa2 tu bersama dengan family / kawan2, kita curi masa tu untuk diri sendiri (bersendirian kdg2 lebih baik). fikiran pun boleh tenang. bukan nak mintak lupakan family, tapi kalau kita sendiri pun berserabut cemana nak uruskan dorang?
betul jugak kata puyol, kita kena bahagikan sama rata antara diri kita & family. jangan duk bz dengan family sampai lupa nak belai diri sendiri.
tak sumer mende tak elok berlaku kat kita, ada yang elok tapi kita ajer yg tak perasan.
so, jangan sedih2 dah...take care ok
halamak.. kena sound la pulak..no lah.. family trip of course best tinggal tertinggal nak blog ajer..tapi kat facebook kan ader..saper suruh racun kunit kata mak dia boring..kan dah..
ReplyDelete@z..bukan sedih..slalu tu tangkap syahdu ajer... trying to change ni.. :)
fadhilah kamsah said, bangun pagi, look at urself in the mirror and say something nice to urself such as 'i look good today'. and before tido pun sama, say something good about today to urself...
ReplyDeleteitulah masalah dia..yang ok,best suma senang terlupa..yang tak best,buruk kalau terlupa pun puas fikir nak ingatkan balik so that boleh share ngan sume orang..best agaknya dapat belas kasihan orang ni.
ReplyDelete